It's a Goal!

Start out by sitting down with your date and choosing goals. This should be done together because it matches you up difficulty-wise, so that one goal isn't a long-term project while the other only takes a few hours, and to help you learn about each other as you go. This is good stuff too - like the things your date wants to experience, along with their hopes, fears, and dreams. Make coffee or open a bottle of wine and have fun with this part.

You might not want to shoot too high on the first goal. For example, don't try to overcome your fear of heights in an afternoon. Instead, set a goal of jumping off the high dive and then head over to your local college pool and spend a bit of time working up through the boards. Some goals may even take a number of sessions, so be patient. And you don't have to complete each goal with your date, it's enough that you'll be there to cheer them on and provide support. Make it clear that you believe in them!

Here are some example goals:

Learning New Things

• Ride a motorcycle
• Learn to swim
• Speak another language
• Make sushi from scratch or a really great French meal
• Surf, ski, snowboard, waterski, or wakeboard
• Rock climbing
• Play poker
• Play guitar or the piano
• Sculpting
• Juggling

Having New Experiences
Goals don't always have to be tangible accomplishments, sometimes they can be things you’ve always want to do, see, or feel.

• Visit another country or state
• See the snow, go sledding or have a snowball fight!
• See a Nascar race, tennis tournament, or other live event.
• See the ocean, go swimming or bodysurfing.
• See an opera, the symphony, live theater, or a ballet.
• Shoot a gun.
• Visit the east coast in the fall to watch the leaves turn.

Career

• Go to or return to College – help them with paperwork, motivation, or to figure out finances
• Additional job training – help them acquire the skills for a promotion

Overcoming Fears
Everyone has fears that need facing, with a little support you might be able to confront one of your own and find out that it’s not as bad as you thought. Don't try to eliminate fears completely, instead just try to diminish it a little bit.

• Heights – work your way up to the high dive or try trapeze school
• Large dogs – borrow a friend's dog or visit the humane society
• Water – practice getting your face wet and swimming underwater in a shallow pool
• Snakes or mice – borrow from a friend or visit a pet store
• Public speaking – volunteer where you will lead a group or teach a class

Physical Achievements

• Climb a mountain
• Lose weight – help them develop a plan, healthy menu, exercise together
• Run, bike, or swim a distance in a certain time
• Do a certain amount of pushups, pull-ups, or other exercise

General

• Build something like shelves, a fence, or a deck
• Paint a room or the entire house
• Install a sprinkler system
• Make candles, soap, or shampoo