Confidence, not Cockiness

My definition is that confidence is the projection of inner strength and security. It is the ability to appear comfortable in any situation. Not to be confused with self-esteem, the emotional realization of competency.

What is "Cockiness"?

My definition is the overly dramatized unrealistic projection of self that usually is interpreted as conceited or inaccurate.

Examples

Confidence: Talking about how passionate you are about your job.
Cockiness: Talking about how much money you make at your job.

Confidence: Talking about how you enjoy fashion.
Cockiness: Talking about all your designer brands and bling.

The past major push of the dating industry was this male chauvinist, egocentric, sexually charged monster group who coined themselves as "Pick Up Artists." They were pushing their game-style tactics while using fake conversations and faker alter egos to attract women. (I call "Games, Gimmicks, and Gaudiness"). This portrayed overbearing cockiness as the one and only way to succeed with women. This makes me nauseous. (See Lesson 1).

The same applies to women. Some women put up such a guard or set their standards much too low. For those of you who put up a guard, sending out the negative vibes and cold stares does not make you approachable. Also, if you are going out with overly-scandalous outfits or showing off too much of the "goods," you will either attract the kind of attention you don't want or the kind of man you don't need.

Find confidence in yourself. But don't overdo it.

Examples from my favorite show "The Big Bang Theory"

#1: How to turn on the confidence

#2: How not to turn on the cockiness

Authored by Loxie Gant

Comments