Still in love, shake it off or hold on?
asked in Relationship Advice by:
In my experience having persistence after someone's dumped you ends with the opposite effect of what you're intending. You'll come across and desperate, needy, and less attractive. I know that sounds harsh, but it's the truth. The best way to get a guy back after he's broken it off is to enjoy your life with friends and see other people, that way you go from someone he had and didn't want to someone that's interesting again.
Do not stay in contact with this guy "a lot." Talk to him if he calls or texts but don't initiate things for a while and feel free to cut your conversations short. He has to understand that because ended your relationship you're not available for him all the time anymore and you don't have time to sit around chatting all day. Even though you probably want to. If you do start thinking of him as a friend some months down the road, then fine, but don't let him keep you as his support system and throw away the rest. If he wants to hang out during the holidays, tell him "maybe." You never know, you might be dating someone else by then. I know you want to be nice and get him back but he ended your relationship and broke your heart, you have a right to be a little upset and standoffish with him.
Yea....I had told him that I would 'wait' for him in a sense...not meaning that I wouldn't date other people, just that I would keep my feelings for him. I actually want to date again soon, and it may sound cold but I'll do it for fun, I'm almost positive that as a Junior I have no interest in my grade or Seniors, and dating younger gets annoying. (Also 'waiting' for him doesn't seem like such a bad option because he's HORRIBLE at flirting and (although I think he's absolutely adorable) his looks are nothing to brag about. Not to be conceited but I doubt he'll find someone who will deal with his nonchalantness in a relationship, or will deal with him (and not mind) like I did) And after that we texted for a while like old friends and had a few laughs. I later was thinking I should cut it short, so I did in a playful and nice way. I'll just wait for him to do the rest, he'll be far away from my thoughts soon anyways as school is starting.
P.S. Since he's gone for a while, enjoy yourself. Hang out with your friends and family. Most girls mope around when their boyfriends are away. Go out and do what you want to do.
